Sticks and Stones...

My recent examination of James' letter for Sunday teaching, along with some conversations and a blog I follow, has led me to review the importance of my word choice. The way I speak sows either life or death. As a child, I learned the adage, “Sticks and stones will break my bones, but words will never harm me.” Though widely quoted since 1857, the second half of the line is false. Words can definitely harm people. I could quote dozens of verses from every portion of the Bible about the power of how we speak and the words we use. I’ll just quote one passage from Jesus’ brother James. “It only takes a spark, remember, to set off a forest fire. A careless or wrongly placed word out of your mouth can do that. By our speech we can ruin the world, turn harmony to chaos, throw mud on a reputation, send the whole world up in smoke and go up in smoke with it, smoke right from the pit of hell.” James 3:5 (MSG) I’ve been guilty of careless and wrongly placed words. My words have damaged people’s worlds, “turned harmony to chaos” and muddied reputations. I’m not proud of some things I’ve said. I know they’ve hurt others and I will have to give an account for destructive words. The words we use are so important that Jesus said: “I tell you this, you must give an account on judgment day for every idle word you speak. The words you say will either acquit you or condemn you.” Matthew 12:36-37 (NLT) Did you catch that? We “must give an account” for every idle, careless, useless word we speak and what we say will either leave us innocent or guilty. Those verses, and many others, fosters the fear of God in me. I wonder how “accounting” will work. Will my words be played back for me to review and defend? Will other people listen to the review of my words in a giant tribunal? I’d like to know how the “give an account” works. Maybe I don’t. If I knew what the defense of my words was going to look like, I might never talk again out of sheer panic. I periodically pray King David’s prayer: “LORD, help me control my tongue; help me be careful about what I say.” Psalms 141:3 (NCV) Memorize his prayer for those precarious moments when your mouth is about to get you in trouble.

Can You Say, "Imitate me"?

The last few weeks I’ve been thinking about parenting and what parents’ “model” for their children. Everyone knows children learn by what they see their parents do. We have common statements that describe this reality. “Do what I say, not what I do.” “Monkey see, monkey do.” “The seed doesn’t fall far from the tree.” “Actions speak louder than words.” Children watch their parents closely. There is a tendency by the child to pick up the habits and practices of their parents. If the parents yell at each other, throw around insults and “name call” they almost guarantee their children will do the same. When confronted with the reality that children imitate their parents, people respond by saying, “I know a child who … his parents were the worst! He didn’t pick up his parents' traits. We can all think of situations like that. Those children are the exception and not the norm. The Apostle Paul told the believers in Corinth “… you should imitate me, just as I imitate Christ.” 1 Corinthians 11:1 (NLT) That is a very bold statement by the Apostle. He knows he is adequately imitating Christ and, because he is imitating Christ, he can challenge the believers to imitate him. I want to live a life that is worthy of imitating. Could I say, “Imitate me as I imitate Christ?” or “Imitate my honesty, my integrity, my leadership, my serving, my compassion, my kindness, and my forgiveness?” As a parent, the onus is on me to live a life that is desirable for my children imitating. Do I want them to tell the truth? I better be a truth teller. Do I want them plugged into a church and regularly worshipping with God’s people? I better be involved and regular. Do I want them to be generous? I better be generous. Do I want them to live a life of service? I better be serving. The inescapable truth is our children will imitate us and they will live the kind of life we live. The Apostle Paul said, “Examine yourselves to see if your faith is genuine. Test yourselves.” 2 Corinthians 13:5 (NLT) Jesus, transform us so we live lives worth imitating. Amen

Talking About Jesus

I love talking to people about Jesus. The night I said yes and surrendered control of my life to Jesus and began the journey as a follower, I immediately wanted to spend my life telling others about Him. That is what Jesus has allowed me to do. I get really excited when I talk with someone, especially if they know little about Jesus, and we discuss the most amazing person who ever lived. We can see his influence in many aspects of life, from the calendar to the way people communicate, even if they don't recognize it. I’ve talked to three people in the last week that have almost no knowledge of Jesus, the Scriptures, or why people believe and go to church. The “church” world is completely foreign to them. I love talking to them. It’s all new, interesting, and challenging. Unfortunately, those who have been around the church can become bored with living a life of faith. I often wonder how someone who follows Jesus, the most intriguing and impactful person in history, can ever get bored. I’m baffled by bored “Christians.” The immense interest in Jesus, has caused both the TV series “The Chosen” and the movie “Jesus Revolution” to become popular. People want to know about Jesus. Take advantage of the season we are in and invite people to join you for Easter. Engage in conversations with them. It's likely they want to know about the King of Kings. Easter is coming. Jesus, help us! Give us the courage to share the wonder of the Most Wonderful One. Amen.

Easter Is Coming

We are only a few weeks away from one of those times when people are more likely to accept an invitation to a church gathering. It’s Easter. There are people in your life that you want to know Jesus in the way you do. You want them to experience His love, grace, hope, and forgiveness. Easter gives you an opportunity to invite them to join you for our Easter Celebration. There is a month until our Easter Celebration. Now is the time to pray for your friends and for opportunities to invite them to join you. Jesus is more concerned about your friends and family than you can imagine. He loves when we pray for people to come to faith. The Apostle Paul wrote: God “wants everyone to be saved and to understand the truth.” 1 Timothy 2:4 (NLT) The Apostle Peter wrote: “The Lord … is being patient for your sake. He does not want anyone to be destroyed, but wants everyone to repent.” 2 Peter 3:9 (NLT) Jesus sacrificed Himself for the people you are praying for. He is working in their lives and desires to use you as a messenger of compassion and mercy. God “brought us back to himself through Christ. And God has given us this task of reconciling people to him. For God was in Christ, reconciling the world to himself, no longer counting people’s sins against them. And he gave us this wonderful message of reconciliation. So we are Christ’s ambassadors; God is making his appeal through us. We speak for Christ when we plead, ‘Come back to God!’” 2 Corinthians 5:18-21 (NLT) Jesus gave me a couple opportunities to talk to people this week about Him. During our conversation, I invited them to join us for our Easter Celebration. It’s never too early to invite people to our Easter Celebration.

Fruit Of The Spirit

Paul the Apostle wrote to the Galatians about the “fruit” that is developed when the Holy Spirit is given permission to work in the lives of His believers. “The Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things!” Galatians 5:22-23 (NLT) The last sentence always pops out to me. “There is no law against these things.” Every one of the fruits the Holy Spirit produces are totally and always legal. There can’t be a law against love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Jesus was the epitome of the “fruit of the Spirit.” Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control define Jesus. The “fruit of the Spirit” shone in His teaching, His healing, and His suffering. Hanging on the Cross, Jesus spoke words of hope to the thief, “Today, you will be with me in paradise.” To the Father he prayed, “Forgive them they don’t know what they are doing.” Jesus wants to produce in us the “fruit of the Spirit.” Producing fruit often requires the pain of pruning (John 15.) He prunes us to produce LOVE by bringing people into our lives that are hard to love. He prunes to produce PATIENCE by leading us into and permitting situations that try our patience. If the fruit came naturally, He wouldn’t need to prune us and it wouldn’t require the Spirit to produce fruit. The fruit doesn’t come naturally so it requires pruning and the flow of the Spirit to produce. That is why it is called “fruit of the Spirit.” Next time you are in a tough situation, ask yourself, “What is Jesus pruning in my life? What fruit is the Holy Spirt trying to produce or ripen in my life?”

"Kindness is Like Snow"

The Holy Spirit is continually working to produce kindness in the followers of Jesus. The Spirit desires kindness In relationships, moments of conflict, and seasons of trials. The Apostle Paul regularly wrote about kindness. Here’s a sampling of what he wrote. “Don’t you see how wonderfully kind, tolerant, and patient God is with you? Does this mean nothing to you? Can’t you see that his kindness is intended to turn you from your sin?” Romans 2:4 (NLT) “The Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness …” Galatians 5:22 (NLT) “Love is patient and kind.” 1 Corinthians 13:4 (NLT) “God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility ...” Colossians 3:12 (NLT) “When God our Savior revealed his kindness and love, he saved us, not because of the righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy.” Titus 3:4-5 (NLT) Are you letting the Holy Spirit produces kindness in your life? Are you growing in kindness? Are you asking yourself what kindness looks like in difficult situations? One last quote by the philosopher and author, “Kindness is like snow. It makes everything it covers beautiful.” Kahlil Gibran

Don't Try to Impress Others

I received a package recently that was in a box much larger than its contents. The box was stuffed mostly with packing paper. It got me thinking about packages and packaging. There are all kinds of reasons companies package items the way they do. Sometimes packaging is about shipping costs. Other times, it’s an attempt to reduce shoplifting. Fragile items are protected during shipping by packing peanuts or bubble wrap. Small, expensive, and desirable items are put in those frustrating “clam shells.” I tend to scratch my head when a small item arrives in an oversized box filled with packing. I think, “Look at the waste. Why did they use that box? There must have been a cheaper way to ship this.” My thoughts then drifted to parallels in people. We all know big people who have lots of packing material but very little substance. They might look impressive when you meet them, but when you get to know them, they are mostly filled with “packing peanuts.” You’ve met them. They talk a great game, but they don’t have game. They like to talk about themselves, who they know, and their accomplishments. They seem to be a little item in an oversized box. I started checking my own life. Am I a little item in an oversized box - filled with packing peanuts and air? Or am I the real deal in the right-sized box? “God opposes to the proud but gives grace to the humble!” 1 Peter 5:5 (NLT) Lord, teach me to walk in humility! “Don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves.” Philippians 2:3 (NLT) Jesus, correct me when I start trying to impress others! “Examine yourselves to see if your faith is genuine. Test yourselves.” 2 Corinthians 13:5 (NLT) Jesus, I want my faith to be genuine and not just packing! Jesus, do your work in me!

Living the "Christ Like" Fragrant Life

Followers of Jesus find themselves in a world much like the pagan world of the First Century Roman Empire. That, of course, means we have many of the same challenges that the ancient church encountered. The ancient church of the First Century was “pre-Christian” and we’re living in a “post-Christian” world. The message about Jesus’ resurrection, forgiveness, transformation and hope to the “pre-Christian” world appealed to people, and the church grew by leaps and bounds. The message about Jesus’ resurrection, forgiveness, transformation and hope to the “post-Christian” world is less appealing and unfortunately, the church is losing ground in the Western world. Many have accepted the message down through the centuries, but many more have rejected it. Paul wrote about the appeal and rejection of the message about Jesus to the believers in First Century Corinth. “Our lives are a Christ-like fragrance rising up to God. But this fragrance is perceived differently by those who are being saved and by those who are perishing. To those who are perishing, we are a dreadful smell of death and doom. But to those who are being saved, we are a life-giving perfume. And who is adequate for such a task as this?” 2 Corinthians 2:15-16 (NLT) The challenge for Jesus' followers, in this “post-Christian” world, is to live a “Christ-like fragrance rising up to God.” Followers should not worry about being “perceived differently by those being saved and by those who are perishing.” Some in your life will appreciate the “Christ-like fragrance.” Others will scorn the “Christ-like fragrance.” How people respond to the “Christ-like fragrance” is not the follower’s responsibility. Living a “Christ-like fragrance” is. Simply put, to some, the smell of the faithful follower of Jesus will smell exceptional. To others, it is putrid. Don’t let people’s response sidetrack you from faithful living. Hopefully, my thoughts encourage you. Let's live the "Christ-like" fragrant life.

Double Down on Pride

I’m an avid reader. I have half a dozen or more books started and am listening to a couple of others. I’m also a “news junky.” I read too many blogs and news conglomerates every week. I can’t stop myself! The appetite for words is too powerful for me to resist. Over the last couple of days, some thoughts about pride have jumped off the pages I’ve been reading. I’m trying to figure out the message being sent and what I’m supposed to do about it. “Pride doesn’t die easily.” Jeremy Norton Pride is what creates insecurity and feelings of unworthiness in a person and pride is also what makes a person secure in their self-righteousness and goodness. Then the clincher … PRIDE ALWAYS MAKES A PERSON FOCUS ON THE SELF. (From: What Does It Mean to Be Chosen? - Volume 1 - The Chosen Bible Study Series) That’s it. PRIDE ALWAYS MAKES A PERSON FOCUS ON THE SELF. I spend too much time focused on myself. I’m always concerned about whether I did enough or too much, said enough or too much, or paid enough or too little attention to someone. I worry about what they thought, what they liked or didn’t like. If I say “NO” to them, what will they think? If I say “YES” to others, what will they think? Right there … That’s it … I used “I” in describing how I focus too much on myself. These thoughts have made me realize I need to double down on pride and apply the Apostle Peter’s words: “Humble yourselves under the mighty power of God … Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.” 1 Peter 5:6-7 (NLT) and double down on Jesus’ brother, James words: “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” James 4:6 (NLT) Humbling oneself “under the mighty power of God” doesn’t come easy. Like every other person since Adam and Eve, focusing on ME is the default response to life. Jesus, forgive me for focusing on me! Weed out every thistle of pride from my life and teach me to live in humility! Amen

Perception, Reality and the Truth

Earlier this week I heard someone say, “the first casualty of the continual spiritual battle between good and evil, light and dark, God and the Devil is truth.” I can’t get that idea out of my mind. The Apostle Paul wrote, “We battle not against flesh and blood, but against spiritual forces.” (Ephesians 6) The battle is real, but it is not what we usually think it is. The battle is a battle for truth and the truth. When an angry confrontation occurs, it is not just a battle of wills; it is a battle for truth. It’s possible that I’m angry because I believe something that is not true. It’s possible that the other person is angry because they believe something that is not true. Most likely, we both believe things that are not true. The untruth, deception, or distortion we believe leads us to take up an adversarial position. In an angry moment, the appropriate response is to check the story I’m telling myself. Do I have the right story or do I have something out of place. I need to check the story I’m believing before I worry about the story the other person is telling themselves. Often, we’ve told ourselves stories about situations and people that were distorted, imagined or simply not true. The battle is not with the other person. The battle is about perception, reality and truth. None of us can compromise the truth. We can’t back down, give in, or to surrender lies. Jesus’ brother Jude encouraged the early believers to “defend the faith.” “Dear friends, … now I find that I must write about something else, urging you to defend the faith that God has entrusted once for all time to his holy people. I say this because some ungodly people have wormed their way into your churches, saying that God’s marvelous grace allows us to live immoral lives.” Jude 1:3-4 (NLT) Jude’s words illustrate that the battle for moral purity and integrity is not a battle against flesh and blood but for truth. Stick up for the truth, don’t back down, and don’t give in. Stand firm in the faith. BUT IN EVERY INTERACTION, RESPOND WITH KINDNESS! We can “defend the faith” and stick up for truth without being ugly or unkind! That’s the Jesus way.

Built Any Bridges Lately?

Last week I didn’t post “Matt’s Thoughts” because I spent most of my time at our local county fair. For the last 34 years, I’ve spent a week during the summer working at the fair. (Except 2021 when fairs weren’t permitted due to Covid) The county fair has been a great opportunity to rub shoulders with people I see little the rest of the year. I look for ways to “love my neighbor” and “pastor” the community. Here’s some examples of opportunities I took to let my “light shine.” The fair is a time to build bridges. I met a man recovering from a near death accident. He explained, in very colorful speech, the extent of his injuries. After listening to his story, I challenged him, from my survival story. I told him he lived survived for a reason and needed to ask God why he survived. He didn’t fully grasp the challenge. So I challenged him again: “God let you live for a reason, and you need to ask Him why you're still here.” He understood and I hope the question of survival challenges him like it did me in 1996. I greeted a woman who had just gone through the loss of a loved one. I greeted her and asked her how her pregnancy was going. She told me, with tears, that she had miscarried during the midst of grieving. I put my arm around her shoulder and prayed for her, while others around us waited for food. I celebrated with a woman whose son has been sober for a year. At the 2021 fair, she told me about the anguish and pain of watching her son abuse alcohol. I prayed with her at the 2021 fair. A year later, she is celebrating to have her son back, working, and making healthy choices. I spent an hour sitting and talking with a couple who I’ve made friends with over the years. They come from a different philosophy of life than me, and we disagree on many aspects of life. But I love this couple and appreciate the opportunity to discuss life, politics, morality and the issues facing humanity from a “faith” point of view. The Apostle Peter instructed the early church “Always be ready to answer everyone who asks you to explain about the hope you have, but answer in a gentle way and with respect.” 1 Peter 3:15-16 (NCV) I try to tell and show people the reason I have for hope. I take the last part of Peter’s instructions seriously: “In a gentle way and with respect.” Gentleness and respect build bridges with people who interpret life differently than me. Bridges make crossing over to faith possible. Few people fight the currents to faith. People cross bridges to faith. I encourage you to look for ways to build bridges by responding with gentleness and respect. Jesus will use your “loving your neighbor” to change lives.

Ask Questions

If you’ve spent any time reading the accounts of the life of Jesus in the New Testament, you probably noticed that Jesus asked a lot of questions. His practice was to ask questions. When people questioned him, he questioned them in return. When someone tried to challenge him, he responded with a question. Jesus didn’t ask questions because he didn’t understand. He understood everything. He knew what people were thinking before they opened their mouth. He asked questions to get other people thinking. Jesus asked the “rich young ruler,” “why do you call me good?” He asked the woman, the religious leaders dragged before him, “where are your accusers?” When he sensed that “power had gone out from Him,” He asked those around him, but to no one in particular, “Who touched me?” When people were abandoning him and the disciples challenged him, he asked them, “do you want to leave also?” Asking questions is an art. Questions say to the other person, “What you have to say is important” and “I don’t know everything” and “I can learn from you.” When a person asks questions and listens, they are telling the other person you are important and valuable. James Thurber correctly states, “It is better to ask some of the questions than to know all the answers.” When Jesus’ brother James wrote, “Be quick to listen, and slow to speak” he could have just as easily written, “Be quick to ask, and slow to answer.” Too often we’d rather hear our own voice, give our opinions, and make our point than ask questions and listen. We’d rather be heard than hear. The Apostle Paul wrote: “Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too.” Philippians 2:3-4 (NLT) One of the best ways to “take an interest in others” is to ask questions and listen. Could it be you and I can learn from others? Is it possible that asking questions and listening is the way forward in our fractured world? Could asking questions and listening to those we don’t agree with or find appealing is the key to building bridges between divided people and groups? “The person who asks is a fool for five minutes, but the person who does not ask remains a fool forever.” Unknown

Make the Most of Every Opportunity

Twice in the Apostle Paul’s letters, he gave instructions regarding living a life of faith among those who lack faith. Embedded in a longer set of instructions, he used the same phrase. “Make the most of every opportunity.” His directive, “Make the most of every opportunity” is amid a description of attitudes, words, and actions that describe his directive. “So be careful how you live. Don’t live like fools, but like those who are wise. Make the most of every opportunity in these evil days. Don’t act thoughtlessly, but understand what the Lord wants you to do.” Ephesians 5:15-17 (NLT) “Live wisely among those who are not believers, and make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be gracious and attractive so that you will have the right response for everyone.” Colossians 4:5-6 (NLT) Making the most of every opportunity requires several things. Every believer must have their eyes, ears, and hearts open to sense “every opportunity.” It is easy in our fast-paced, divisive, mind your own business, to miss opportunities. Seeing, hearing and sensing” every opportunity often requires slowing down, listening, observing and empathy. Here is a list of the other attributes, attitudes, and characteristics necessary to “make the most of every opportunity.” Carefulness is living. Wisdom. Acting thoughtfully towards others. Understanding what the Lord wants. Gracious and attractive speech. Understanding the right response in each situation. Making the most of every opportunity is an enormous calling. It is not something I can do in my strength. When I try to make the most of every opportunity in my strength or thinking, I fall far short of “making the most.” Making the most of every opportunity requires dependence on the Spirit. In another of Paul’s letters, he gave instructions about relying on the Spirit. “I say, let the Holy Spirit guide your lives. Since we are living by the Spirit, let us follow the Spirit’s leading in every part of our lives.” Galatians 5:16, 25 (NLT) Holy Spirit, teach us, lead us and empower us to see, hear, sense and “make the most of every opportunity.” AMEN

Discernment in the Information Age

I have been giving a lot of thought to the practice of “discernment” the last while. We live in the “information age.” Each of us has at our fingertips more information in a day than our grandparents had in their entire life. The trouble with information is it isn’t always accurate. Information does not equal knowledge. People can have a wealth of information but, it is just a wealth of information. Information is easily confused with knowledge, expertise, or skill. Researchers at MIT studied 126,000 news stories tweeted 3 million times from 2006 – 2017. The researchers discovered that “false news” or misinformation traveled 6 times faster than truthful news or accurate information. Accurate news rarely reached more than 1,000 people. False news or misinformation regularly reached 1,000 to 100,000 people. One reason for the speed of misinformation is people’s desire to be “first” with novel information researchers concluded. People want to be “in the know” sooner than others and often are rewarded by people’s likes and retweets. “It’s easier to be novel and surprising when you’re not bound by reality,” commented Deb Roy of MIT. Frequently fake news and misinformation is “spicier” than accurate news and information. Unfortunately, unsensationalized news doesn’t spread very fast. Paul told the followers of Jesus that Satan is “the commander of the powers in the unseen world,” and “He is the spirit at work in the hearts of those who refuse to obey God.” Ephesians 2:2 (NLT) Jesus told his disciples that Satan “is a liar and the father of lies.” John 8:44 (NLT) Knowing that Satan is the father and perpetrator of lies, the people of God should be the most cautious of all when swallowing information and passing it on. We are instructed to sift through everything, keeping what is true, honorable, right, pure, lovely and admirable. Philippians 4:8 (NLT) Discernment is to be the believer’s way of life! “Be on guard.” “Test everything.” “Cling to what is good.” (1 Corinthians 16:13; 1Thessalonians 5:21; Romans 12:8) That includes what I just wrote!

How to Live in a "Cancel" Culture

“Affirm” and “Cancel” are two words used in the cultural lingo of the day. We’ve all witnessed the way these two ideas have played out. I’ve been chewing on the idea that neither of these words and what they represent in culture are in line with the life that Jesus asks His followers to live. Last week (9.24.2021) I addressed “affirm.” This week I’ll address “cancel.” Cancel or “Cancel Culture” refers to a form of shunning or boycotting. Someone thinks something, says something, or does something out of step, or disagreeable to another and they are “canceled.” They are silenced, their opinion, thinking, and words are deemed unimportant and meaningless. The person canceled has nothing of value to add, they are shamed into silence. The practice of “cancelling” goes directly against the commandment of Jesus to “Love your neighbor” and “Love one another.” Below is Paul’s description of love from 1 Corinthians 13. As you read through the description of love, do you see anything that even closely resembles “cancelling?” “Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous, it does not brag, and it is not proud. Love is not rude, is not selfish, and does not get upset with others. Love does not count up wrongs that have been done. Love takes no pleasure in evil but rejoices over the truth. Love patiently accepts all things. It always trusts, always hopes, and always endures. Love never ends.” 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 (NCV) Throughout Jesus’ three years of public ministry, the Jewish leaders continually attempted to cancel Jesus. Jesus challenged the Jewish leaders, sometimes forcefully, but he never cancelled them. They were often wrong in their views, opinions and practices and Jesus would confront them, but not cancel them. They were people he was going to hang on the cross and die for. Many of the Jewish leaders became followers of Jesus after his resurrection. He listened, he asked them questions in response to their questions and accusations, but cancelling was not Jesus’ way. His instructions were explicit. “Love your enemies. Pray for those who hurt you.” Matthew 5:44 (NCV) The Apostle Paul emphasized Jesus’ command. “Bless those who persecute you. Don’t curse them; pray that God will bless them.” (Romans 12:14 (NLT) Jesus instructs us to love those who “cancel” us and to bless those who use cancelling as a weapon against us. Loving our enemies and blessing those who want to silence us is hard work; but it is the Jesus way.

What Is The Loving Thing To Do?

“Affirm” and “Cancel” are two words used in the cultural lingo of the day. We’ve all witnessed the way these two ideas have played out. I’ve been chewing on the idea that neither of these words and what they represent in culture are inline with the life that Jesus asks His followers to live. This week I'm addressing "Affirm." Next week I'll address "Cancel." Think about the two words and their interplay. If a man declares that he is actually not a man but a cat, culture expects a “loving” person to affirm them without reservation or question. When doesn’t affirm them as a cat, the person is viewed as “unloving” and in many situations is “canceled.” The reason behind the declaration is that the man doesn’t correspond with the features, nature and biological reality of a cat. The man declares he is a cat and expects affirmation because it is obvious he is not a cat. If he were obviously a cat, he wouldn’t need to tell anyone he’s a cat. Anyone who has tried to talk someone out of suicide has been loving by NOT AFFIRMING the suicidal ideation. Affirming the idea of suicide would assist the person in taking their life. Love, in that situation, for the person and their extended community, is to do everything possible to prevent suicide. This is true when of destructive behaviors and choices. The loving thing is usually NOT AFFIRMING the ideas, behavior, or choices. The loving action is to speak truth, confront wrong thinking, and prevent when possible destructive choices. The way of Jesus is to affirm people made in the image of God. Jesus’ way is to affirm they have purpose and destiny. Affirming a person is not the same as affirming their ideas, attitudes, behaviors, and choices. There are countless examples in the accounts of the life of Jesus when he confronted, challenged, and talked people out of destructive patterns. The woman at the well, the woman caught in adultery, the “Rich Young Ruler” and Zacheus are a few examples. To the woman guilty of adultery, Jesus said, “Go and sin no more.” He didn’t affirm her sin. He called her to change and to reverse the course of her life. Loving is, at times, “NOT AFFIRMING.” Rejecting a person’s thinking, attitudes, choices, and behavior is not the same as rejecting the person. Don’t buy into the growing idea that love and affirmation are the synonymous. They are not synonymous unless they are synonymous. Be a truth teller. Affirm people not faulty and unhealthy thinking, attitudes and choices. The Apostle Paul said, “Love rejoices over the truth.” Remember, truth always corresponds with reality.

Listen

Jesus assigned the early church the mission of making disciples. He said, “Go into all the world and make disciples.” Jesus’s “Great Commission” can be understood to mean, “as you are going about life, make disciples.” Making disciples is the assignment of every Jesus follower. He intends that EVERY follower would talk about His work in their life when they are with their families, around the fire warming themselves, at the market, cleaning fish or selling their wares. Telling others about Jesus’ work should be part of the everyday flow of life. Imagine someone shares a struggle they are going through and as you listen to their words, heart, and frustrations, an opportunity presents itself for you to share how Jesus brought peace and wisdom to your own struggle. Listening is one of the greatest gifts a person can give to another. Listening does not come naturally to most of us. Listening is not the same thing as not talking. Listening is engaging the ears, heart, and brain. Listening takes work. Listening takes self-denial and a serving heart. Next time you are in a conversation, listen. Listen to the other person’s words, hurts, frustrations, and insecurities. When you listen, you send the message that you care. After you’ve listened, ask questions, and then listen some more. You will be surprised at the opportunities Jesus will create for you to share about how he’s worked in your life! The Apostle Peter told the first century disciples, “if someone asks about your hope as a believer, always be ready to explain it. But do this in a gentle and respectful way.” 1 Peter 3:15-16 (NLT) Pray that Jesus will teach you to be sensitive to the people he brings across your path. Listen to their story. Ask questions. When approappropriate, about Jesus’ impact, help and work in your own journey.

My Truth, Your Truth and The Truth

Over the last few years, there has been considerable usage, discussion, and controversy around the terms “My Truth” and “Your Truth.” Oprah Winfrey’s use of the phrase “your truth” in her Golden Globe speech in 2017 moved the phrase from the sidelines and onto the playing field. Traditionally, “truth” has been thought of as a group of shared common facts. Society agreement on common facts is important for cohesion and peaceful living. Common facts were the ideas that correspond with reality and are true. Ideas and facts that don’t correspond with reality are not true. The terms and concepts behind “my truth” and “your truth” are most often used in “philosophical and moral” discussions. People can and do debate and judge philosophical issues, moral viewpoints and positions using my truth, your truth labels. Seldom are the terms used in practical life application. My truth/Your truth shifts the idea into a different arena. An idea, thought, perception, belief I hold, is my truth even if it doesn’t correspond with reality. It is my truth when it corresponds with my reality. It is your truth, but not mine, when it corresponds with your reality. When I pay my mortgage, purchase gas, or stop in to grab some donuts, I don’t argue about my truth and your truth. The businesses and I agree on “reality” for the product or service. I’ve never argued “My truth” tells me “Your truth” about the price of gas is too high. I’m only paying “My truth” for the gas! Here’s $X for the gallon of gas. My truth wouldn’t get me very far when the sheriff showed up for stealing. When I served on a jury for a criminal trial, the judge didn’t instruct the members of the jury to interpret the “victim’s truth” verses the “defense’s truth.” The judge instructed the jury to listen to all the evidence and testimony and then determine guilt or innocence based on the facts. Jesus said: “I am the truth.” John 14:6. Jesus, his life, the way he lived life, his teachings and his relationships reveal a way that corresponds to reality. No one has ever lived, died, risen and impacted the world like Jesus. He is TRUTH. S. Lewis famously said: “I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen: not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else.”

Keep Talking

During almost every graveside or memorial serve I’ve officiated; I spend a few minutes giving my thoughts about “What do I do now?” I hope people will consider what they should do as they walk away. THOUGHT #5 - LOVE ONE ANOTHER. THOUGHT #6 - LIFE IS TOO SHORT TO BUILD WALLS. DON’T BUILD WALLS. TEAR DOWN EXISTING WALLS. THOUGHT #7 – KEEP TALKING The idea of “cancel culture” is not new. People have been “canceling” others from the beginning of time. Walking away from others, breaking off friendships, not talking, and not listening is as old as humanity! People have “canceled” siblings. Remember, the first murder recorded in the Old Testament was Cain “canceling” Abel. Joseph’s brothers sought to cancel him. (Genesis 37-50) Aaron and Miriam, in jealousy, sought to cancel Moses, his leadership and speech. (Numbers 12) If we are honest, we too, have canceled people. Someone says something we don’t like so we give them the silent treatment. Someone disagrees with us, and we don’t invite them into future conversations. If someone doesn’t like an idea we have, we hide that idea from them. The better way is to listen, continue talking, invite those who disagree into the discussion, talk with the person who is angry and find out the source of the anger. This is the better way. “Never pay back evil with more evil. Do things in such a way that everyone can see you are honorable. Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone.” Romans 12:17-18 (NLT)

Don't Build Walls

At almost every graveside or memorial serve I’ve officiated; I spend a few minutes giving my thoughts about “What do I do now?” I hope people will consider what they should do as they walk away. THOUGHT #1 - DEATH IS THE DESTINY OF EVERY PERSON. WE WILL ALL FACE DEATH. THOUGHT #2 - LIVE AS IF TODAY IS YOUR LAST DAY ON EARTH. THOUGHT #3 - ENCOURAGE ONE ANOTHER AS IF YOU’LL NEVER BE ABLE TO ENCOURAGE THEM AGAIN. THOUGHT #4 - PRAY FOR ONE ANOTHER. THOUGHT #5 - LOVE ONE ANOTHER. THOUGHT #6 - LIFE IS TOO SHORT TO BUILD WALLS. DON’T BUILD WALLS. TEAR DOWN EXISTING WALLS. You and I both know that people get offended. I’ve gotten offended. You’ve been offended. One of the primary themes of Jesus’ teaching was forgiveness. The Lord’s Prayer, the prayer Jesus taught his disciples, contains the line; “forgive us our debts as we forgive others.” Jesus expected the need to forgive others would be a regular occurrence in people’s lives. The only topic in that prayer that he revisited was forgiveness. “If you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” Matthew 6:14-15 (NIV) Rehashing each offense is like adding bricks to the wall between you and the person who offended you and the wall grows larger and more impenetrable. The walls create an emotional and relational barrier between people. Walls make life into a “maze” of confusion and misdirection. Walls of offense don’t come down without work. It requires serious effort to dismantle them. Dismantling walls can be terrifying, complicated, and unsettling. Don’t let the stress and strain of pulling the wall apart stop you. If there is a wall between you and someone else, pray for wisdom and get to work pulling the wall apart. It may happen one brick at a time, but with the wisdom Jesus promises, the wall can come down. Forgive. Don’t build walls. Tear down existing walls. Walls make a maze course what it is. Remove the walls and the maze will disappear. Life is too short to live a “maze life”.