I Did the Crime - He Did the Time

The Apostle Paul announced: “Everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God’s glorious standard.” Romans 3:23 (NLT) Everyone includes you. Everyone includes me. We all fall short. We’ve not only fallen “short of God’s glorious standard,” our sin has hurt others. Some of our sins have hurt others in small ways and some sin has wounded people deeply. The sin of others has hurt us in small ways and other sin in unforgettable ways. The answer to falling “short of God’s glorious standard” is mercy. I’m thankful that God’s mercy toward me is “afresh every morning.” Lamentations 3:23 (NLT) (I find it interesting that the solution for Romans 3:23 is Lamentations 3:23) Mercy, by us towards others, is not deserved. If it were deserved, it wouldn’t be mercy. God gives mercy because of Jesus’ life, death, burial, and resurrection. Jesus’ death paid the price for me “short of God’s glorious standard.” The old song says: “He paid a debt He did not owe; I owe a debt I could not pay.” I could also say “I did the crime, but He did the time.” Because of God’s mercy toward us, He commands us to have mercy on others. Jesus said: “Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy.” Matthew 5:7 (NIV) Mercy, by us towards others, is not deserved. If the person deserved mercy, it wouldn’t be mercy. Jesus’ brother James understood Jesus’ teaching about mercy. He wrote: “There will be no mercy for those who have not shown mercy to others. But if you have been merciful, God will be merciful when he judges you.” James 2:13 (NLT) Who in your life do you need to forgive? Who do you need to quit “making them pay” for their wrong? What if God withheld mercy from you?” Are you able to rely on God’s mercy because you’ve been merciful to others? If you don’t figure out mercy, there will be “no mercy” for you. Jesus, help us grow in mercy towards others. Amen.

Easter Is Coming

We are only a few weeks away from one of those times when people are more likely to accept an invitation to a church gathering. It’s Easter. There are people in your life that you want to know Jesus in the way you do. You want them to experience His love, grace, hope, and forgiveness. Easter gives you an opportunity to invite them to join you for our Easter Celebration. There is a month until our Easter Celebration. Now is the time to pray for your friends and for opportunities to invite them to join you. Jesus is more concerned about your friends and family than you can imagine. He loves when we pray for people to come to faith. The Apostle Paul wrote: God “wants everyone to be saved and to understand the truth.” 1 Timothy 2:4 (NLT) The Apostle Peter wrote: “The Lord … is being patient for your sake. He does not want anyone to be destroyed, but wants everyone to repent.” 2 Peter 3:9 (NLT) Jesus sacrificed Himself for the people you are praying for. He is working in their lives and desires to use you as a messenger of compassion and mercy. God “brought us back to himself through Christ. And God has given us this task of reconciling people to him. For God was in Christ, reconciling the world to himself, no longer counting people’s sins against them. And he gave us this wonderful message of reconciliation. So we are Christ’s ambassadors; God is making his appeal through us. We speak for Christ when we plead, ‘Come back to God!’” 2 Corinthians 5:18-21 (NLT) Jesus gave me a couple opportunities to talk to people this week about Him. During our conversation, I invited them to join us for our Easter Celebration. It’s never too early to invite people to our Easter Celebration.

God is in the Cleaning, Transforming and Restoring Business

I’m a collector of quotes and sayings. I have thousands of quotes saved. My Dropbox folder of “Teaching Resources” has 688 sub-folders, as of today. Each of those sub-folders has multiple files of quotes and sayings ranging from “abortion” to “zealots.” Anytime I’m reading and find a useful or memorable statement, I collect it. Recently, I saved a couple of quotes that have been running over and over in my mind. They have to do with God’s desire and ability to work in and transform our lives. He desires reconciliation with every person. “All our bad does not make us harder to save, and all our good does not make us easier to save. What saves us is Christ, and therefore all we contribute is honesty—admitting we are sinners and casting ourselves on him.” Dane Ortlund Someone else has said, “You can’t do anything to cause God to stop loving you and you can’t do anything to cause Him to love you more.” He loves us despite who we are, and not because of who we are. He loves us because of who He is. “No matter where you have been, what you have done, or what has been done to you, the grace of God can wash you clean, consecrate you as his child, and restore what sin has stolen.” Garrett Kell God is in the cleaning, transforming, and restoring business. Admitting we are sinners and casting ourselves on Him paves the way for Him to do what we have deep down wished could happen. Who doesn’t want forgiveness, freedom, cleansing, a new life, hope, purpose, and destiny? Don’t wait. Admit you are a sinner and cast yourself on Him. “Cast all your care upon Him, because He cares for you.” 1 Peter 5:7 (MEV)

Admitting Our Mistakes and Asking for Forgiveness

Just a few weeks ago, Liberty Mutual Insurance published results of their 2022 research from their “Responsibility Project.” Over 1,000 adults were asked about their attitudes toward responsibility. Participants were asked to define “personal responsibility.“ 46% choose “Doing what’s expected of you or what you’re supposed to do.” 31% choose “Admitting to or owning mistakes.” 23% chose “Doing something especially hard or challenging.” The definition I find interesting is “Admitting to or owning mistakes.” Admitting to mistakes or wrongs is foundational for followers of Jesus. Jesus taught the disciples to pray, “Forgive us our trespasses.” Confession is necessary for healthy and obedient living. Jesus famously challenged people to stop pointing out the speck in someone else’s eye and ignoring the log in their own eye. “Speck watching” and “Log denying” are both contrary to admitting mistakes. Steps 4 and 5 of Alcoholics Anonymous are about “admitting to or owning mistakes.” 4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves. 5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs. One of the primary causes of broken relationships is unwillingness to admit wrongdoing. Over the years I’ve heard countless people complain “they never ask for forgiveness.” Forgiving others does not depend on the offender admitting their wrong or asking for forgiveness. BUT, living a healthy life IS dependent on admitting offenses and asking forgiveness. How are you doing in this area? Do you admit your offenses? Do you ask others for forgiveness? Your health as a person depends on admitting your wrongs and asking for forgiveness. Strive to make admission and confession part of your life.

Living the "Christ Like" Fragrant Life

Followers of Jesus find themselves in a world much like the pagan world of the First Century Roman Empire. That, of course, means we have many of the same challenges that the ancient church encountered. The ancient church of the First Century was “pre-Christian” and we’re living in a “post-Christian” world. The message about Jesus’ resurrection, forgiveness, transformation and hope to the “pre-Christian” world appealed to people, and the church grew by leaps and bounds. The message about Jesus’ resurrection, forgiveness, transformation and hope to the “post-Christian” world is less appealing and unfortunately, the church is losing ground in the Western world. Many have accepted the message down through the centuries, but many more have rejected it. Paul wrote about the appeal and rejection of the message about Jesus to the believers in First Century Corinth. “Our lives are a Christ-like fragrance rising up to God. But this fragrance is perceived differently by those who are being saved and by those who are perishing. To those who are perishing, we are a dreadful smell of death and doom. But to those who are being saved, we are a life-giving perfume. And who is adequate for such a task as this?” 2 Corinthians 2:15-16 (NLT) The challenge for Jesus' followers, in this “post-Christian” world, is to live a “Christ-like fragrance rising up to God.” Followers should not worry about being “perceived differently by those being saved and by those who are perishing.” Some in your life will appreciate the “Christ-like fragrance.” Others will scorn the “Christ-like fragrance.” How people respond to the “Christ-like fragrance” is not the follower’s responsibility. Living a “Christ-like fragrance” is. Simply put, to some, the smell of the faithful follower of Jesus will smell exceptional. To others, it is putrid. Don’t let people’s response sidetrack you from faithful living. Hopefully, my thoughts encourage you. Let's live the "Christ-like" fragrant life.

Rest For My Soul

The Genesis account of creation details God creating a body out of dust of earth, and then breathing into the body the breath of life. When the breath of life flowed into Adam’s body, he became a “living soul.” The soul is the integration of the outer physical man and the inner man. When the outer person is hurting, the inner person hurts too. When the inner person is hurting, the outer person often experiences the effects of the inner turmoil. King David described the connection between the inner person and the body. “When I refused to confess my sin, my body wasted away, and I groaned all day long. Day and night your hand of discipline was heavy on me. My strength evaporated like water in the summer heat.” Psalms 32:3-4 (NLT) David was experiencing physical effects because of unconfessed sin. The connection between the body and the inner person is undeniable and unbreakable. No one can escape the cause-and-effect connection. Undealt with anger produces stress. Stress produces physical consequences like hypertension, insomnia, and digestive issues. Hypertension, insomnia and digestive problems affect a persons’s emotions, ability to process information and make healthy decisions. Physical struggles impact a person psychologically, emotionally, and spiritually. David again described the soul, the connection of the body, and inner person. “Finally, I confessed all my sins to you and stopped trying to hide my guilt. I said to myself, ‘I will confess my rebellion to the LORD.’ And you forgave me! All my guilt is gone.” Psalms 32:5 (NLT) Jesus is an expert at restoring the soul. David declared in Psalm 23, “He restores my soul.” Jesus said, “Come to Him … he will give you ‘rest for your souls.’” Jesus cares about your soul. He wants you to have a healthy soul. Keep turning to Jesus.

Amazed by Grace

Recently, I read slowly through Galatians, the Apostle Paul’s letter to the church in Galatia. Towards the end of the letter, Paul uses phrases such “Let the Holy Spirit guide your lives” 5:16; “Directed by the Spirit” 5:18; “Living by the Spirit” 5:25; “Follow the Spirit” 5:25; and “Please the Spirit” 6:8. Galatians 5 describes the tension that we live in. We want to please the Spirit, but our sinful nature tempts and pulls at us. Living in the Spirit, following the Spirit, and pleasing the Spirit is life in the tension between sin and grace. Grace frees us from sin and calls us to live in, follow, and please the Spirit. Sin taunts us and pulls at us. Sin “wants to do evil, which is the opposite of what the Spirit wants” and the “two forces are constantly fighting each other” according to Galatians 5:17 Sinclair Ferguson describes the tension this way: “The spiritual life is lived between two polarities: our sin and God’s grace. The discovery of the [sin] brings us to seek the [grace]; the work of the [grace] illuminates the depths of the [sin] and causes us to seek yet more grace.” I’m thankful for grace. I’m thankful that when I sin, grace is available. I’m thankful that when grace illuminates the depths of my sin, it causes me to see yet more grace. Grace “teaches us to say “No” to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright godly lives in this present age.” Titus 2:12 NIV The words of an old hymn are playing in my mind right now; “Grace, grace, God’s grace. Grace that will pardon and cleanse within. Grace, grace, God’s grace, Grace that is greater than all my sin!” Jesus, thank you for grace, I’m still amazed by it!

Be Kind

“Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.” Ephesians 4:32 (NLT) “Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.” Colossians 3:12 (NLT) “Sympathize with each other. Love each other as brothers and sisters. Be tenderhearted and keep a humble attitude.” 1 Peter 3:8 (NLT) “It is good when you obey the royal law as found in the Scriptures: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’” James 2:8 (NLT) “Dear children, let’s not merely say that we love each other; let us show the truth by our actions.” 1 John 3:18 (NLT) The letters of Paul, Peter, James, and John provide clear directives about how followers of Jesus should treat other people. The directives and principles apply in fair weather situations and stormy situations. Inexperienced pilots utilize visual flying and fly in good weather, when roads, rivers and other landmarks are clearly visible. Experienced pilots not only fly in calm conditions but when there is a cloud cover, the wind is blowing, and conditions are subpar. In stormy weather, experienced pilots read their instruments and gauges in the cockpit and respond appropriately. Following Jesus requires more than visual flying. Following Jesus requires reading, interpreting, and believing in the instruments of spiritual flight. We can tell if we are following Jesus in stormy weather by checking ourselves for the qualities of kindness, forgiving, being tenderhearted, humble, loving, demonstrating truth – these are the readings of our “instruments”. If the instruments reveal we are not acting in kindness, forgiving, showing compassion, humility, showing or living truth; we must adjust! Kindness, tenderheartedness, forgiveness, mercy, humility, gentleness, patience, sympathy, and obeying the royal law are crucial in stormy relationships and situations. Most people can follow Jesus when the conditions are favorable. Stormy relationships and conditions reveal healthy followers of Jesus. Jesus, teach us how to read the instruments and fly with you and for you in stormy conditions. Amen

Keep Talking

During almost every graveside or memorial serve I’ve officiated; I spend a few minutes giving my thoughts about “What do I do now?” I hope people will consider what they should do as they walk away. THOUGHT #5 - LOVE ONE ANOTHER. THOUGHT #6 - LIFE IS TOO SHORT TO BUILD WALLS. DON’T BUILD WALLS. TEAR DOWN EXISTING WALLS. THOUGHT #7 – KEEP TALKING The idea of “cancel culture” is not new. People have been “canceling” others from the beginning of time. Walking away from others, breaking off friendships, not talking, and not listening is as old as humanity! People have “canceled” siblings. Remember, the first murder recorded in the Old Testament was Cain “canceling” Abel. Joseph’s brothers sought to cancel him. (Genesis 37-50) Aaron and Miriam, in jealousy, sought to cancel Moses, his leadership and speech. (Numbers 12) If we are honest, we too, have canceled people. Someone says something we don’t like so we give them the silent treatment. Someone disagrees with us, and we don’t invite them into future conversations. If someone doesn’t like an idea we have, we hide that idea from them. The better way is to listen, continue talking, invite those who disagree into the discussion, talk with the person who is angry and find out the source of the anger. This is the better way. “Never pay back evil with more evil. Do things in such a way that everyone can see you are honorable. Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone.” Romans 12:17-18 (NLT)

Don't Build Walls

At almost every graveside or memorial serve I’ve officiated; I spend a few minutes giving my thoughts about “What do I do now?” I hope people will consider what they should do as they walk away. THOUGHT #1 - DEATH IS THE DESTINY OF EVERY PERSON. WE WILL ALL FACE DEATH. THOUGHT #2 - LIVE AS IF TODAY IS YOUR LAST DAY ON EARTH. THOUGHT #3 - ENCOURAGE ONE ANOTHER AS IF YOU’LL NEVER BE ABLE TO ENCOURAGE THEM AGAIN. THOUGHT #4 - PRAY FOR ONE ANOTHER. THOUGHT #5 - LOVE ONE ANOTHER. THOUGHT #6 - LIFE IS TOO SHORT TO BUILD WALLS. DON’T BUILD WALLS. TEAR DOWN EXISTING WALLS. You and I both know that people get offended. I’ve gotten offended. You’ve been offended. One of the primary themes of Jesus’ teaching was forgiveness. The Lord’s Prayer, the prayer Jesus taught his disciples, contains the line; “forgive us our debts as we forgive others.” Jesus expected the need to forgive others would be a regular occurrence in people’s lives. The only topic in that prayer that he revisited was forgiveness. “If you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” Matthew 6:14-15 (NIV) Rehashing each offense is like adding bricks to the wall between you and the person who offended you and the wall grows larger and more impenetrable. The walls create an emotional and relational barrier between people. Walls make life into a “maze” of confusion and misdirection. Walls of offense don’t come down without work. It requires serious effort to dismantle them. Dismantling walls can be terrifying, complicated, and unsettling. Don’t let the stress and strain of pulling the wall apart stop you. If there is a wall between you and someone else, pray for wisdom and get to work pulling the wall apart. It may happen one brick at a time, but with the wisdom Jesus promises, the wall can come down. Forgive. Don’t build walls. Tear down existing walls. Walls make a maze course what it is. Remove the walls and the maze will disappear. Life is too short to live a “maze life”.

Love One Another

At almost every graveside or memorial service I’ve officiated; I spend a few minutes giving my thoughts about “What do I do now?” I hope people will consider what they should do as they walk away. THOUGHT #1 - DEATH IS THE DESTINY OF EVERY PERSON. WE WILL ALL FACE DEATH. THOUGHT #2 - LIVE AS IF TODAY IS YOUR LAST DAY ON EARTH. THOUGHT #3 - ENCOURAGE ONE ANOTHER AS IF YOU’LL NEVER BE ABLE TO ENCOURAGE THEM AGAIN. THOUGHT #4 - PRAY FOR ONE ANOTHER. THOUGHT #5 - LOVE ONE ANOTHER Jesus commanded his followers to “Love one another.” In the early evening before his execution, He told the disciples, gathered for their last meal, “I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.” John 13:34-35 (NLT) Love is a verb. Love is choosing the best for your friends, neighbors and enemies. Love doesn’t mean you always feel good about someone else. Love means you want the best for them. Love is a sacrificial word. Jesus modeled love and then described it. “There is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.” John 15:13 (NLT) Tell other people you love them. You might not get another opportunity. Don’t waste your last chance. I remember a friend of mine whose son died after a long battle with cancer telling me about a conversation he had with his older brother. His older brother’s son had died instantly, with no warning. My friend’s older brother was jealous because my friend had time to tell his son goodbye and of his love for him. Don’t waste an opportunity. We express love by forgiving each other. You can’t love someone and hold a grudge against them. Forgiving is a sacrificial act of love. The other person doesn’t deserve forgiveness and you sometimes don’t want to give it. Make a choice for their best and your best and forgive them. A principle to live by: You reap what you sow! (Galatians 6:7) Take the time and effort to sow love. You will reap it in return. Love might not always reap love, but hatred almost always reaps hatred. Obey Jesus and, “Love one another!”

Make the Most of Every Opportunity

At almost every graveside or memorial serve I’ve officiated; I spend a few minutes giving my thoughts about “What do I do now?” I want people to consider what they should do as they walk away. THOUGHT NUMBER ONE - DEATH IS THE DESTINY OF EVERY PERSON. WE WILL ALL FACE DEATH. THOUGHT NUMBER TWO - LIVE AS IF TODAY IS YOUR LAST DAY ON EARTH. No one knows how many years they will live. No one knows which will be their last year, their last month, or their last day. The thought that today could be the last day on earth is a sobering thought. Few people want life lived in the shadow of that thought. If today was your final day on earth, what would you do differently? Would you forgive someone? Would you apologize and reconcile with someone? Would you change any priorities? Would your words be more carefully chosen and spoken? Would you tell someone that you loved them? Would you tell them what they mean to you? I’m convinced if we knew today was our last day, we would do things differently. To often we get out of bed assuming that we have plenty of time. We slip into speech that has become comfortable. The same is true for attitudes, priorities, choices, and responses. The Apostle Paul wrote the church in Ephesus and Colosse “make the most of every opportunity.” Ephesians 5:16; Colossians 4:5 What would it look like if TODAY and TOMORROW you “Made the most of every opportunity?” Don’t take today for granted. Don’t take tomorrow for granted. Don’t take the people in your life for granted.

Stay Alert

The Apostle Paul experienced many trials during his 30 years as a follower of Jesus. Some trials were the mistreatment by people, some attacks by spiritual forces of darkness, and some were both. Paul was wise regarding these trials, tribulations and suffering. In one of his letters to the church in Corinth he encouraged the church to forgive a wayward member “so that Satan will not outsmart us.” (2 Corinthians 2:11 NLT) Paul knew that unforgiveness, grudges, and bitterness play into the hands of Satan and his desire to “kill, steal and destroy.” (John 10:10 NLT) Paul continued his instructions, reminding the church that “We are familiar with his [Satan’s} evil schemes.” (2 Corinthians 2:11 NLT) Satan and the kingdom of darkness have evil schemes to destroy people’s lives and to destroy Jesus’ work on earth. Paul and the Corinthian believers might have been “familiar with his evil schemes”, but I’m not sure that believers in the 21st century are. Let me clue you in or remind you of some of Satan’s evil schemes. Keep people from forgiving each other. If Satan can keep people from forgiving, unforgiveness grows unabated and eventually the fruit of bitterness ripens and sends out bitter seeds to everyone the bitter person encounters. Divide people so they can be conquered. If Satan can divide a person’s heart, divide them from their family, church family, and community; complete domination is not far behind! A primary strategy of war has always been to divide and conquer. Jesus taught “a kingdom divided cannot stand.” Induce fear. People who allow fear to creep in and grow become paralyzed. People living in the grips of fear make bad choices, push other people out of their lives, and hide in guilt, shame, and panic. Provoke anger. Satan will use any and every means possible to provoke people to anger. He uses, disappointment, hurt, confusion, frustration, and alarm. Anger gives the enemy a “foothold” to climb the wall of protection around a person’s life. (Ephesians 4:27 NLT) There are plenty of other “evil schemes” that Satan uses. The Apostle Peter reminded the early believers to pay attention to what is going on in their lives. “Stay alert! Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour. Stand firm against him and be strong in your faith.” 1 Peter 5:8-9 (NLT) Stay alert my friend! The enemy is marching at double speed to produce havoc in people’s lives. Stay alert!

In God We Trust

After my morning run on January 6th, I joined with others from SWAG for a time of prayer on Zoom. Much of the time praying concentrated on the country, the rallies in Washington, DC and across the country. We prayed against violence, property damage and loss of life. We prayed that God would speak to his followers at the rallies to act and react honorably. Unfortunately, our prayers were not answered the way I had hoped. As the morning unfolded, my heart broke as I watched the events unfold in Washington, DC. Not since 1812 has the nation’s capital experienced anything like yesterday’s tragic events. Protestors defiled the space where every president has given their State of the Union address, laws have been made, wars have been declared and heroes of our country have laid “in-state.” Many of you have visited the Capital and experienced the sacred space that was violated. The debate over who the protestors were, and their motives will extend long into the future. In my mind, it doesn’t matter who they were or their motives, the desecration of the Capital yesterday is one of the saddest days our country has experienced in my lifetime. If God was involved in the formation of America, and I believe that He was, tears were streaming down his face. I believe God wept yesterday. Followers of Jesus must concentrate on obeying the truths of Scripture. We need to repent of shameful attitudes and, speaking words that bring death instead of life. We must focus on loving our neighbors and our enemies, praying for our leaders, our country, and standing against the forces of darkness that provoke evil. “Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the LORD our God.” (Psalms 20:7 NIV) Follower of Jesus, will you turn from trusting in “red and blue chariots and horses” and trust in God? Will you live like you are trusting God? Will you speak like you are trusting God? Will you pray like you are trusting God? Will you love others like you are trusting God? The legislative, executive, and judicial branches of government will not redeem the shameful conduct of 2020 and the unimaginable events of yesterday. What “the enemy meant for evil, God can use for good.“ (Gen. 50:20: See the story of Joseph from Genesis 45-50, if you are not familiar with this verse.) God will only be able to work redemption if the followers of Jesus respond like Joseph the patriarch did almost 4,000 years ago. If Joseph had not responded as he did, with integrity and forgiveness, God would not have used what was meant for evil to bring about a good outcome. Jesus called the church the salt of the earth and the light of the world. The country will putrefy, and the world will continue to slide into darkness if followers of Jesus lose their saltiness and hide the light! Be as the salt, be the light, be Jesus to this lost and decaying nation. Matt

The "First Blow Against the Enemies Schemes"

2020 has been a crazy year filled with all sorts of twists, turns and “I didn’t see that coming” events. The stressors on people have left many in relationship turmoil. People feel isolated, fractured and confused. Uncertainty abounds. I have watched people avoid interactions with others in stores and community settings. As I talk with people I find them reticent to enter into conversations because of an uncertainty of where the conversation might lead. I have found myself asking the question “Is this conversation going to lead to conflict and disagreement.” If, as Jesus said, “a kingdom divided cannot stand” then one of the tactics of the enemy is to divide and conquer. The enemy hasn’t conquered yet but he’s definitely at work dividing. King Solomon warned his son to guard his heart. Obviously it was a warning to guard against giving in to temptation and corrupting influences. His warning is applicable to relationships, emotional wounds, rejections, and conflict. “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” Proverbs 4:23 (NIV) Solomon’s first three words “above all else” have always grabbed my attention. Before anything else, the first thing to do, the number one priority is to “guard my heart.” John Eldredge combined Solomon’s words and the Enemy’s tactics when he wrote: “Caring for your heart is the first blow against the Enemy’s schemes.” Forgive, be generous, give the benefit of the doubt. When you take this attitude you send the “first blow against the Enemy’s schemes.” The Apostle Paul wrote, “We are not ignorant of the enemy’s schemes.” (2 Corinthians 2:11) Don’t give in to the enemy’s scheme of dividing and schisms. Don’t just be on the defense against the enemy. Go on the offense. Guard your heart, forgive, be gracious and generous. Don’t give the enemy a foothold. (Ephesians 4:27)

The Hard Work of Forgiveness

Relationships are hard work! They are fraught with disappointment, hurt and confusion. Communicating is hard work. Listening is hard work. Understanding others requires emotional savvy that rarely comes naturally. Hurts, anger and frustration are more than just toppings in relationships. Sometimes they are major ingredients.

Jesus had reams to say about forgiveness. Forgiveness is one core, if not THE core component of Jesus’ teaching. One of the last lines that Jesus spoke, dying upon the cross was, “Father, forgive them [those who had demanded and carried out his execution] they do not know what they are doing.”

Forgiveness is difficult because it is counter-intuitive. We tell ourselves lines such as “If I forgive someone, then I am ‘letting them get away’ with the wrong” and “If I forgive, they’ll just hurt me again.” But forgiving someone for a wrong does not mean that the offender gets a pass. Forgiving someone means I won’t make them pay. The law, consequences, and ultimately the judgement of God may make them pay. By forgiving the offender, I am released from being responsible for justice and payback and that transfer responsibility to God.

My forgiving or not forgiving has no bearing on whether someone will re-offend. You and I both have forgiven people, and the offender never hurt us again. We have also NOT forgiven and then the offender hurt us again.

Unforgiveness will make you and me into “mutants.” The hurt we hold on to while not forgiving mutates the inner person of the victim. The mutation continues to multiply and consume until eventually bitterness fills the person. The odd reality about the mutation is the offender may not know they hurt the person, or eventually forgets about the victim, leaving the victim to suffer while the offender goes on with life mutation free!

Forgiving others is an enormous deal. Jesus said, “If you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins.” Matthew 6:15 NLT

Jesus, teach us how to forgive, and give us the strength to forgive and the courage to forgive! Amen.

Careless and Useless Words

As a student and teacher of the ancient writings found in the Bible, there are statements in the writings that frighten me. I’m not referring to the historical accounts found in the Jewish Scriptures (the Old Testament) about Sodom and Gomorrah or Lot’s wife turning into a pillar of salt. I’m referring to some of Jesus' words.

Jesus said, “If you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” (Matthew 6:15 NIV84) The thought that my unforgiveness would prevent my own forgiveness scares me because I have SINS! Or, Jesus said, “Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather, be afraid of the One who can destroy both soul and body in hell.” (Matthew 10:28 NIV84) Jesus is encouraging people to not let the “fear of man” control their lives but instead to let the “fear of God” control them.

The teaching of Jesus that terrifies me is about the things a person says. Most of the people Jesus taught communicated only through speech. We communicate in a variety of ways. In the 21st century his teaching applies to every way that we use words; the spoken word, written word, social media posts, shares, and likes. And about our communication Jesus said, “Out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks. … I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken. For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned.” (Matthew 12:34-37 NIV84)

The words that come out of my mouth and from the end of my fingertips, come straight out of what is in my heart and I will be JUDGED by those words. That scares me and sometimes terrifies me!

Jesus, I need continual surgery done on my heart so that my words are not “careless” and useless. Help me! Amen

Diagnosing Unforgiveness Attitude and Action Checklist

Here are some indicators that you may have ‘unforgiveness’ issues in your life. As you read through them you will likely be reminded of people, situations and memories where these attitudes and actions occur. The healing comes to you as you forgive.

Signs of Unforgiveness
o Judging others: Seeing the ‘speck’ in someone else’s eye while not seeing the ‘log’ in your own eye.
o Ongoing anger and resentment towards someone.
o Keeping score.
o Thinking of ways to get even with others who have hurt you.
o Making others ‘pay’ for no reason.
o Carrying bitterness and anger against those who have offended you or willfully wronged you.
o Constantly doubting his/her loyalty and motives.
o Retreating into isolation from others – creating walls – pushing people away.
o Avoiding those who have hurt you.
o Not wanting to deal with a person or situation
o Walking the other way when you see the person.
o Hoping he/she doesn’t show up somewhere.
o Feeling sick in your stomach when you see the person.
o Erupting in anger, or ‘boiling’ inside – sometimes for no apparent reason.
o Burying the wrongs done to you without really addressing them.
o Gossiping about somebody instead of resolving the issues that you have with that person.
o Acting like nothing happened, instead of confronting issues that have hurt you.
o Instead of stating the truth, you make excuses for those who have hurt or wronged you.
o Feeling sorry for yourself.
o Occasionally, thinking you’re some kind of martyr.
o Feeling like nobody has had it as bad as you.
o Wanting to get even with people who have caused you pain.
o Insulating and protecting myself behind a wall of defensiveness.
o Not trusting others.
o Regularly thinking about and talking about what occurred and about the person who offended you.
o An unwillingness or inability to ‘bless’ the other person and to want ‘God’s Blessing’ on them.
o Thinking or saying: I just ‘can’t’ forgive (usually means I won’t forgive).
o Being angry with God for allowing bad things to happen to you.
o Shallow friendships. You can be ‘friendly’ but you can’t go deep with others.
o Being too sophisticated to be outwardly critical and mean, but inwardly you’re distant, shallow and self-protective.


How do you know if you have a grudge?
o You find yourself holding on to offenses.
o You can’t get over your past.
o You have imaginary conversations with those who have offended you in your head.
o You avoid them at all costs, or when you do see them you wish you could hide.
o You compare yourself to and dismiss them.
o You are constantly looking for ammunition to gossip about the person’s life: “They did it to me, now I get to do it to them!”

Unforgiveness Builds Walls

Not all unforgiveness issues and grudges create anger, tension and animosity. Instead, they may create distance as people build an emotional wall between themselves and others. As time goes on the wall gets higher, thicker and covered with ivy and moss. Eventually the wall has been around so long that people live with it between them with very little thought as to the reason for the wall or the reason to tear the wall down.

Robert Louis Stevenson, the famed author of Treasure Island, tells the story of two unmarried sisters who shared a single room. As people who live in close quarters are apt to do, they had a falling out with each other. Their dispute was over a theological issue. The dispute was so intense that, instead of agreeing to differ, they simply didn't speak to each other ever again.

The division between them became so bad the two sisters drew a line with chalk down the middle of their room to mark off their respective territories. They continued to exist, (they were existing, not living) in the same room together, but never said a word to each other again.

Each of the sisters endured the cold shoulder and silence of the other over the years even as friends came around or as they ate meals. The sisters lived out the remainder of their lives in this miserable condition.

At graveside services, funerals and memorials I almost always encourage people to forgive one another, to not build walls and to tear down walls. Life is too short and too precious to exist separated from others.

‘If you’ve drawn a line on the floor in chalk,’ I would encourage you to forgive and to erase the line. You will only experience health, and remove bitterness and grudges when you forgive. Jesus said, “But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.” (Luke 6:27-28 TNIV)

Thoughts on Forgiveness

During this teaching series on FORGIVENESS I’ve talked about how forgiving and forgetting are not the same thing. Sometimes we forgive and we do forget. Other times we forgive and yet the memory still lingers for a while. Other times we forgive and yet there are things that continually remind us of the past, past relationships and people that hurt us.

What we do with the memories is what is important. Will we use the memories to ‘get even’ with the other person or someone else? Will we use the memory to feed our sorrow and dysfunction? Will we do the healthy thing and by forgiving turn the memory into a thing of the past that will have no control over our present?

Clara Barton, the founder of the American Red Cross, was reminded one day of a vicious deed that someone had done to her years before. As someone tried to get her to remember the incident she acted as if she had never even heard of the incident.

“Don’t you remember it?” her friend asked.

“No,” Barton replied, “I distinctly remember forgetting it.”

What will we do with our memories?

Someone has said: One of God’s better jokes is the ability to remember the past without the capability of undoing it.

Clara Barton was not saying that she forgot but that she was not going to dwell on the offense. It was not going to come up again. It was not going to control her. She was not going to use it to ‘get even’ with someone. As far as she was concerned – the past is the past is the past.

Let’s learn to ‘distinctly remember forgetting’ those things that we’ve forgiven.

Matt